Sleeping is hard work!

That must be why it so rarely happens for me. It's now 2am. My husband and I turned in around 11pm. During the first hour, I think I dozed a bit before I got up twice to shush the barking dog. Then I dozed a bit more before Busy woke up and fussed. I've become a horrible Ferber parent, preferring to step in early for a brief comforting intervention ... this means I commit the cardinal parenting sin of PICKING MY CHILD UP. (GIH: But I thought we weren't supposed to pick her up?! CMG: Shut it! -- This is the quickest way for me to get back to sleep.) Except that tonight it's not. Fingers are crossed that the latest rocking and cuddling worked -- but NO! I hear the cries again. Why why why why why? (ooh, that word is pretty easy to type repeatedly. Let's try it again: why why why why why?)

With my luck, if and when I ever DO get back to sleep, that will be when Big has a nightmare and cries out for Mommy. (Ah, now Busy cries in earnest. Teething again? Still suffering from the latest cold?) I used to stick to the Ferber plan, except when child was known to be in physical distress. Now I can't tell anymore. What to do, what to do. Putting her down at naptime and bedtime is never a problem. And she doesn't wake up every night. Sometimes she's only fine from 8pm-5am, but most nights (when healthy) she sleeps until nearly 7am.

Dammit, I've been online now for over an hour, and I've exhausted all my interests at this hour. There's nothing going on on the Internet and I just want to go to sleep! Here's what will happen if I go try to wait this out in bed: I'll toss and turn, trying to get comfortable while not allowing GIH to breathe on my face. I have never been able to tolerate anybody breathing on my face, even if I'm not trying to fall asleep. Also, last time I was in there he had an ELBOW on my side of the bed. Yeouch. My feet are cold inside my socks right now and I really want my slippers but I'm not sure where I left them.

This time when I went in to Busy's room, I was "strong" and didn't pick her up. She tried to climb out of the crib into my arms, though. I hugged her, patted her, talked to her gently, made two attempts to lay her down, covered her with a blanket, and left. Now I think she cried for a few minutes (fewer than 5) and has now been mostly quiet again. The baby monitor is lighting up, but that's in response to the music that's playing in the crib (remnants of the mobile.) The real test will come when the 15 minutes of music are up. Meanwhile, I'm so awake right now that I'm going to need another 10 minutes of shut-down time. My crossword puzzles are now all downstairs, and if I go down at this time of night, I will set the dog to barking again.

See what I mean? Sleeping is hard!